Challenging behaviours in the classroom? Here’s what you need to know…
I want to share a thought I’ve been percolating a lot on… one that could change the way you see every single moment of “challenging behaviour” in the classroom.
Here it is: At the root of all behaviour is safety.
All of our actions… our behaviours… are rooted in a foundational system designed to keep us safe. Our nervous systems are wired to work from a “safety first” principle — long before we consciously “choose” anything at all.
In other words: The body decides before the brain rationalizes.
There’s a word I love for this “Neuroception”: it’s your body’s automatic safety-detecting system, working below conscious awareness (coined by neuroscientist Dr. Stephen Porges!).
It works behind the scenes like a security guard, constantly scanning for danger or safety. Ready to jump into action before your thinking brain even gets a chance to weigh in.
Here’s where it becomes vital in the classroom:
Autistic students often have extra-vigilant security guards.
Their bodies may sound the alarm in response to bright lights, sudden noises, shift in routine, unclear social dynamics, or demands that feel too big.
When that alarm goes off → behaviour happens:
Fight: yelling, ripping papers, hitting
Flight: bolting, hiding
Freeze: shutting down, going silent
Fawn: people-pleasing just to stay safe
Not “misbehaving.”
Not “non-compliant.”
But 👉 Safety-seeking.
For example, the autistic student who craves routines isn’t being rigid to annoy or defy you. Rather, their body is trying to create safety through predictability (because when they know what’s coming next, their nervous system can finally breathe).
Here’s the kicker: YOU operate from this exact same system too.
When your tone sharpens when you have to ask a student to stop poking their peer… for the third time…
When you clamp down for control because all of the students are getting too loud in the classroom…
When you go into over-explaining, avoidance, or shutdown when communicating with your admin…
All of that is your nervous system trying to feel safe.
But you know you’re not reacting that way because you’re a ‘bad person’. You’re trying to find a sense of order, control, and regulation in a system that often feels chaotic. Just like kids, we respond from safety first, strategy second.
💡Reframing Implication:
If we assume that behaviour is communication, then we can see behaviours as either:
— a signal of safety (play, explore, connect, learn), or
— a strategy for safety (avoid, control, lash out, withdraw).
Once you understand that, you stop asking, “How do I get them to behave?”
and start asking, “How can I help their security guard feel safe enough to stand down?”
✨That’s where neuroinclusive teaching lives.
✨That’s when learning-alliance practices replace compliance-based measures.
✨That’s how we stop taking behaviour personally — and start responding powerfully.
So star this post. Save it. Share it. Scribble safety first in the margins of your lesson plan.
Because once you see behaviour through this lens… you’ll never be able to unsee it. And all your students will feel the difference too.
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